A man walks into a bank. I need to update my contact information. Sure fill in this form. Man fills form and leaves bank.
A man is eating lunch, and receives a call. It’s from the bank, can you come? We have a problem with your signature.
A man walks into a bank, again. Because sir the signature we have for one account is good but for the other account it doesn’t match we need both to match in order to update your contact details for this other account if you want we can update them for the first account but leave the old ones for the second account ok?
A man scratches his head.
The above account is a true story as witnessed inside Emirates NBD. I did see him scratch his head.
The issue was eventually sorted out when the supervisor assured the lady that since the accounts share the same (insert acronym here), one record can be updated and would be valid for both accounts.
Would the updated records also cover the credit cards? No sir for credit cards please go upstairs.
In the end we compromised. We settled for taking the Titanium model avec spoiler, with the option of having it either replaced at a later date (thus ending up with a spare spoiler), or swapped with a future prospective buyer (guy goes to Al Tayer looking at Ford Fiesta, sales tell him “oh and we have an option to upgrade to a brand new unwanted sports spoiler, interested?”). We were hooked on the options, so we didn’t want to downgrade anymore.
The new car. Apologies for the crop, was risking falling backwards on the landscaped slope.
The sales experience was laughable though. After taking an accusatory tone for the hassle I was creating, once we told them to go ahead they were all smiles and greetings and how’s everything. What really got me was:
“There. Now in about two weeks’ time you will be contacted by our customer service desk, asking about the sales experience. Please leave favourable comments as it affects us.” Fat chance.
This was also my first time taking out a loan in Dubai, through which I discovered the banking system’s reliance on cheques as method of payment. Why are they clinging on to them? What is the issue for not creating standing orders. I had to sign sixty cheques, and had to counter-sign two of my own signatures becuase “they were not like the rest”. Which led me to consider going back to my branch to make sure the signature they have on file matches the one I used, don’t want another sixty headaches.
